One of the questions that husbands and wives eventually get to after the honeymoon phase (and sometimes before then) is: Does the Bible say anything about hormones? And the answer is that in the Greek the word for hormone doesn’t exist, and in the Hebrew the word hormone doesn’t exist. I checked. This does not mean that the scriptures are silent, but it does mean we have to study and think carefully.
In 1 Peter 3:5-7 we discover some very, very telling things about the woman and her hormonal nuances, but they’re somewhat lost in the complexity around the rest of what is in that passage.
For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
I have bolded some key text that requires us to do some Bible study (aka hermeneutics). Who is Peter writing about as examples? Old Testament women [specifically Sarah]. The Old Testament has some very telling things to say about women (including their hormones) and husbands are to be diligent researchers of their wives and their ongoing hormonal changes because their wives are women. Women who were known to have very real hormonal cycles and real hormonal needs.
What does the Old Testament say about women and hormones? We find the following passages Leviticus 12:1–8, Leviticus 15:19–24, Leviticus 15:25–30, Leviticus 18:19, Leviticus 20:18. In each of these passages (or verses) we find that women are to be given special treatment because of their being women. There are concerns around pregnancy, periods, and men respecting these boundaries. If they don’t there are consequences (in the Law). This is honorable treatment. This isn’t subjugation or treating women as less than, it is a way that God, knowing what hormones were, but knowing that humans were not knowledgable, created a space for women to be protected from “always on” men.
We discover that the women had physiological limitations and Peter assumes that his Old Testament educated readers just get this. As we fast-forward to the 21st century most of us have forgotten this context.
How about perimenopause and menopause? Let me introduce you to one of the stars Peter referred to, Sarah. When the Angel of the Lord comes to Abraham and Sarah in Genesis 18 we find in verse 12 that Sarah laughs and she laughs because she cannot believe that people with the hormonal changes that prevent women from having children have already happened. She knows about them, and so do all of the other women. Furthermore, she can’t believe that they’re going to enjoy having sex again (or at least pleasure in it).
Some Key Takeaways
It’s worth noting that 1 Peter is a great starting point for us to see that women have hormones and those hormones cause complexity in marriage. Women are to attempt to be walking by the Spirit (being godly) as a testimony of their salvation. Husbands are responsible for sorting that out by learning and adapting.
If you’re a woman needing counsel on hormones I would strongly suggest you take the time to seek medical care from a qualified professional and husbands support your wives in this! If you’re a husband who thinks, “My wife is changing so fast and I don’t know what to do,” this is likely a time to embrace learning and growing and communication. Your wife will appreciate your attempt to be known and understood. You also, are to be walking by the Spirit and being gentle and patient and long-suffering [the fruit of the Spirit].
The scriptures don’t tell us how to deal with every hormonal fluctuation, but they do help us understand that God knew we were different as males and females, we are to be committed to understanding physiological change, and not just stuck in our understanding of one another.